{"id":6804,"date":"2019-11-11T21:49:01","date_gmt":"2019-11-11T20:49:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/2019\/11\/11\/escuchar-a-los-bebes-es-un-acto-revolucionario\/"},"modified":"2021-04-12T17:31:45","modified_gmt":"2021-04-12T15:31:45","slug":"escuchar-a-los-bebes-es-un-acto-revolucionario","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2019\/11\/11\/escuchar-a-los-bebes-es-un-acto-revolucionario\/","title":{"rendered":"Listening to babies: a revolutionary act"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Babies feel, listen, perceive, know, understand, are moved, express, communicate. Babies love. They give. Give smiles, caresses, gazes, babbles. They gift us. They move us. They fill us. Babies are a transforming presence for those that love, care, and live with them.<\/p>\n<p>However, the modern world denies newborn capacities in a brutal way.<\/p>\n<p>Generally,\u00a0 they are (mis) treated as if they were clueless of the world around them and as if they were going to remember nothing of what happens. But this is not so. What happens to us as babies remains in our memory even though it is not recorded in the form of words. They are pre-verbal memories, and precisely for that reason, they are recorded in our body. We all carry, imprinted in our body and our skin, memories of when we were babies.<\/p>\n<p>Babies perceive the emotions of those around them. They know if their caregiver is happy, confident, sad, or stressed. That is why I believe it is so important, when I speak to coworkers \u2013 pediatricians, midwives, nurses, I beg them to\u00a0<strong>speak\u00a0<em>with<\/em>\u00a0the babies<\/strong>. Explain to them, just like they do to any other patient; don\u00b4t speak only to the parents; speak directly to the child too. But, of course, we must know how to do so.<\/p>\n<p>Baby time is slow. First, we must know how to listen: without hurrying, in silence, with our full attention. Babies, like everyone else, need to know what is going to happen to them, especially if they are separated from their mother o if their needs cannot, at the moment, be met. It is crucial to warn them about what is going to occur, explain the next steps or procedures.<\/p>\n<p><strong>A proposal for sensitive, respectful communication from medical and nursing staff to infants must include:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Greet, present myself, honor the infant:\u00a0<\/strong>\u201c<em>Hello baby (name)! I am here, I am listening, and if you\u00b4d like, I will explain.\u201d\u00a0<\/em>Or better yet:\u00a0\u201c<em>Hello baby (name)! I recognize you, I know why you are and where you come from, I recognize your presence, welcome! I am glad to be here with you now\u201d<\/em><\/li>\n<li>Take your time,\u00a0<strong>anticipate<\/strong>, so they can prepare. For example: \u201c<em>I have to take a good look at you. I will do so right here, next to mother and father, they will take off your clothes so I can see how you are. It won\u2019t take long, and then you will be back in mother\u00b4s arms.\u201d<\/em><\/li>\n<li><strong>Eye contact: respect it<\/strong>. Often babies are so overwhelmed by perceptions that they do not make eye contact, in order to process information or to protect themselves from sensory overstimulation. If they are traumatized (for example by the birth) it may take them longer to make eye contact, or they might not make it with certain people. In these cases, you can tell them something like:\u00a0<em>\u201cI see you are looking away, I would like you to know that I am here, whenever you are ready.\u201d<\/em>\u00a0or \u201c<em>I understand, you do not have to make me happy, I am here in case you need me.\u201d<\/em><\/li>\n<li><strong>Say farewell, always<\/strong>. In maternity or pediatric wards, do not leave the room if the infant is crying and the parents do not react by consoling the child; encourage them to help their infant, pointing out or naming everything they do well.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Babies need time. Learning to listen to them means to offer our presence. There are\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/psychoanalysis.org.uk\/our-authors-and-theorists\/esther-bick\">classical schools that teach how to observe babies<\/a>, and wonderful professionals adept at listening (like my beloved Mar\u00eda Emilia Dip). I learn from all these resources, and I believe that\u00a0<strong>listening to babies is a deeply revolutionary act<\/strong>. Or at least, the one I chose. Specially now a days.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Namast\u00e9 baby<\/em><\/strong><strong>!\u00a0<\/strong><em>(I recognize the divine in you!)<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Babies feel, listen, perceive, know, understand, are moved, express, communicate. Babies love. They give. Give smiles, caresses, gazes, babbles. They gift us. They move us. They fill us. Babies are a transforming presence for those that love, care, and live with them. However, the modern world denies newborn capacities in a brutal way. Generally,\u00a0 they &hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more\"> <a class=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2019\/11\/11\/escuchar-a-los-bebes-es-un-acto-revolucionario\/\"> <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Listening to babies: a revolutionary act<\/span> Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6323,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":""},"categories":[245,260],"tags":[267,268,269],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - 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All babies are born in love with their mothers. They love us. Some time ago I wrote: we are born to love and to be loved. Now I rewrite it: we are born loving, deeply in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Birth&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Birth","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/birth\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/nacer-enamorado.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/nacer-enamorado.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/nacer-enamorado.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/nacer-enamorado.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/nacer-enamorado.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6793,"url":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2020\/03\/22\/letter-to-a-mother-isolated-from-her-newborn\/","url_meta":{"origin":6804,"position":1},"title":"Letter to a mother isolated from her newborn","author":"I.O.","date":"22 March 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Dear patient, Thinking about you, I realize you might be\u00a0a mother who has been separated from her infant. Or perhaps a father. I know of some cases where both, mother and father, are going through coronavirus infection, isolated, without their newborn. Maybe mother is in the hospital, alone, and father\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Breastfeeding&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Breastfeeding","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/breastfeeding\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG-20200319-WA00441.jpg?fit=1200%2C984&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG-20200319-WA00441.jpg?fit=1200%2C984&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG-20200319-WA00441.jpg?fit=1200%2C984&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG-20200319-WA00441.jpg?fit=1200%2C984&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG-20200319-WA00441.jpg?fit=1200%2C984&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6815,"url":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2020\/01\/09\/breastfeeding-and-infant-feeding-in-emergencies\/","url_meta":{"origin":6804,"position":2},"title":"Breastfeeding and infant feeding in emergencies","author":"I.O.","date":"9 January 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Every time there is a catastrophe I cannot help thinking about the babies, the mothers, the pregnant women, haw how they all will fare. Now that Australia burns, I watch the news with sadness and worry\u2026 I think it is crucial that we share the information that people like professor\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Breastfeeding&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Breastfeeding","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/breastfeeding\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/81106963_10216699967793749_5864520990758797312_reducida.jpg?fit=607%2C359&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/81106963_10216699967793749_5864520990758797312_reducida.jpg?fit=607%2C359&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/81106963_10216699967793749_5864520990758797312_reducida.jpg?fit=607%2C359&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6802,"url":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2020\/03\/26\/letter-to-a-pregnant-mother-during-the-pandemic\/","url_meta":{"origin":6804,"position":3},"title":"Letter to a pregnant mother during the pandemic","author":"I.O.","date":"26 March 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Dear pregnant mother, Several close Friends have asked me to write this letter to you. Perhaps you are surprised that I call you \u201cmother\u201d if you are expecting your first child, but the truth is, I believe we are mothers from the moment we accept carrying a baby inside of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Maternity&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Maternity","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/maternity\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG-20200326-WA0007-e1675187446428.jpg?fit=835%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG-20200326-WA0007-e1675187446428.jpg?fit=835%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG-20200326-WA0007-e1675187446428.jpg?fit=835%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG-20200326-WA0007-e1675187446428.jpg?fit=835%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":7357,"url":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2018\/04\/17\/si-quieres-ser-padre-o-madre-por-gestacion-subrogada-necesitas-esta-informacion\/","url_meta":{"origin":6804,"position":4},"title":"Surrogacy from the Perspective of the Infant\u2019s Mental Health","author":"I.O.","date":"17 April 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Translated by Jesusa Ricoy If you are considering becoming a mother or a father via surrogacy, there is some important information you should know regarding the baby\u2019s health, which agencies that promote surrogacy tend to omit. Please allow me to briefly outline some of the most important points based on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Maternity&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Maternity","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/maternity\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/handmaid-tale.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/handmaid-tale.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/handmaid-tale.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/handmaid-tale.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":56534,"url":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/2025\/05\/02\/the-harm-of-surrogacy\/","url_meta":{"origin":6804,"position":5},"title":"The Harm of Surrogacy","author":"I.O.","date":"2 May 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"We human beings are born expecting to meet our mother. The baby in the womb has a very clear idea of who its mother is, no matter how much the disassociation is promoted from outside with the argument that \u2018it is not genetically theirs\u2019. Surrogacy is an orphanhood (equivalent to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Ecofeminism&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Ecofeminism","link":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/category\/ecofeminism\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/tribuna-opinion.jpg?fit=910%2C852&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/tribuna-opinion.jpg?fit=910%2C852&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/tribuna-opinion.jpg?fit=910%2C852&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/iboneolza.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/tribuna-opinion.jpg?fit=910%2C852&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6804"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6804"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6804\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16389,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6804\/revisions\/16389"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6323"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6804"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6804"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iboneolza.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6804"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}